Diagnosis





"The righteous person may have many troubles, but the LORD delivers him from them all." Psalm 34:19 NIV

On August 9, 2016, I found myself in an unimaginable situation. At 22 years old, I was diagnosed with Stage 1 breast cancer. In a matter of two weeks, I found myself at stage 2. I was diagnosed with an aggressive form of Breast Cancer that is hormone driven. It's hard to explain the way I felt, but to be honest I was not afraid. What scared me most was hearing the doctor say I needed chemotherapy and a bilateral mastectomy. Not many women my age would think of having breast cancer, but it is possible. Thankfully, I was able to find the lump on my right breast in just a matter of time. What if I did not find it in time? Where would I have been at this exact moment? When I found the lump, I thought it was a Fibroadenoma (non-cancerous tumor, most common in young women) but it turned out to be cancerous. 

Before I was diagnosed I was scheduled to go for a breast ultrasound, however, that same hour I was sent for an immediate mammography. You could imagine what was going through my head. I think I was most worried about the mammography instead of the results. Anyways, I was then scheduled for a breast biopsy. For some reason I remained calm throughout this entire process. I guess deep down inside I already knew that I had breast cancer. I felt more angry than anything else. My life was about to completely change, and I did not know how to deal with it so fast. I had to cope with the idea that I was going to lose my hair, lose my breasts, lose the ability to have kids, and probably not be the same person anymore. But the truth is, I am the same person, just stronger and wiser. 

Now, two and a half months in from receiving chemotherapy and losing my hair, I can honestly say I do not even know how I made it this far. Receiving the most aggressive chemotherapy, I found myself sick almost all of the time. At one point, I wanted to give up and just call it my time to go home. But the truth is, I have a lifetime ahead of me and what helped me the most was the support I received from friends and family, especially my trust in God. One thing I can say is no one will ever understand what it is like to be in my shoes and I pray that no one will ever have to find out. But this entire experience has taught me to grow closer to God and learn to love myself for who I truly am. Thus far the most difficult experience for me has been losing my hair. Life is not the same wearing a beanie around and having people constantly stare at you and mumble. It has truly made me more self conscious than anything, but you know what gets me by? The fact that this is just TEMPORARY! I continuously remind myself everyday that a year from now, everything will be back to normal. With only four more treatments to go, my hair finally growing back, and breast surgery in January, it amazes me how much my life has changed, but it has truly showed me what I am capable of as a woman. 


Xoxo - Kristin


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